How To Create A New You
Part 1: Why the old you is not good enough
I thought a lot about how to start this post. There was no way to say what I wanted to say, without it sounding weird. And there still is no way for that, so…
today we’re gonna talk about how fucked up we really are.
And how much we need to replace who we are with a better version of ourselves.
If you truly believe that you are the best possible version of yourself, that’s amazing. You can skip this post and I’ll see you next week.
But if you feel like there is room for improvement, then keep reading.
Let’s talk about Ohnok again for a second. It’s time you learned a bit more about him. Ohnok is a 20 year old student, a social person and looking from afar , his life is pretty good actually.
But from his view, Ohnok is missing something. He feels stuck.
Ohnok feels like everybody else around him is doing the most and he is still in the same place, being weighed down by something. No matter what he does he is way behind.
Maybe you feel the same way. Maybe you feel like there is something dragging you back. Well there is actually, in both your and Ohnoks case.
And if you have 10 minutes to spare, you can find out what the thing weighing you down is exactly.
Lets talk about your Childhood
No better place to start than the beginning. The foundation on which your whole personality is built upon is defined in the first 6 to 7 years of your life. You will grow up, you will learn things and improve. But that kid you were is still somewhere inside of you.
This inner child is a part of what we call the subconscious mind.
Im not making this shit up, this is something that a guy did some studies about like a hundred years ago. The guys name was Sigmund Freud. You might’ve heard about him.
He defined the subconscious mind as our automatic response system. It’s easier to get it with an example:
If I was to offer you some food you hate, let’s say tofu, you’re automatically going to think to yourself: ew, no.
You don’t have to think about if you like it or not, your subconscious mind takes care of that first instinct.
And in the center of that automatic process lies our inner child. All of your thoughts are built upon that. That foundation that you created in your first years is controlling all the automatic thoughts and feelings that you have now.
But how does your inner child decide this?
How does your subconscious mind know what you like and what you don’t or what makes you happy or hurt?
David Goggins explained this concept really well, so I’m gonna steal it:
Imagine that as a child, you were given a large red backpack to wear at all times.
Nobody ever told you what it was for, but the adults around you started putting rocks into the backpack that you then kept carrying around.
So you thought that this was the purpose of the backpack and started putting rocks in there yourself. Over time, some of the rocks fell out or broke down to smaller rocks but most of them stayed right there.
And by now, the backpack is like, really fucking heavy.
Sometimes you take a look at these rocks and realize you don't recognize most of them.
They're just there, they have been there for years, many of them you don't even remember how long.
You look at the rocks on top and you don’t even notice how many more there are on the bottom. And you realize you still don't even know what the purpose of this backpack is.
All our childhoods involve these rocks in some way. Some have had a really bad childhood and now their backpacks are overflowing. By no fault of our own, but we are the ones left with this burden.
Our backpacks were filled by all these other people that had an influence over our life.
The backpack doesn't weigh your body down, it weighs your soul down. Every single rock makes every decision and experience and therefore your life harder.
Your ex girlfriend or boyfriend who really hurt your feelings, your teacher who told you that you are not gonna make it in life or some close friends who talked behind your back or even a stranger who said something rude about you.
Why would you carry this backpack that somebody put on your back and filled up with rocks?
Why the fuck would you do this without questioning it? Why would you keep carrying it and at the same time keep wondering why other people are getting farther and getting there faster?
When you take a look at all these rocks and start getting rid of them, you will realize that they are not our regular rocks made of sand or granite or whatever.
That would be too easy.
These black rocks are made of leftover hatred, anger, guilt, shame and many other things. They come from injuries or injustices or mistakes you can't or won't or haven't even tried to let go of.
The backpack represents the subconscious mind we talked about earlier.
But if you're reading this, you are likely an adult with a lot more control over your life. You choose what goes into your backpack and who gets to put something in it. There is no need for these things to weigh you down that much. It's time to let go.
It's time to empty your backpack full of rocks that your parents, friends, teachers or even strangers put there. It's time to take a look at all these rocks and face them.
Like I said, destroying these rocks is not possible, they will always be here. But you can choose which ones to keep with you.
Take what you need.
Not every rock serves a purpose. Some are only there to weigh you down. Some are only there to keep you up at night. Yeah, some are only reminders of your stupidity. But a lot of them can help you out. So choose wisely which ones to keep.
Take what you need.
By picking your rocks you can influence your inner child just as much as it influences you. You can change what makes it mad or reminds it of bad things. By accepting that these rocks are a part of you, you won’t feel their weight anymore.
You could never outrun somebody who learned how to pack their backpack.
Somebody who only took what they needed.
All of this is really easy to say, but how the fuck are you supposed to reach into the backpack and start taking stuff out.
Well, as I told you about the backpack and all these things, let me be the one to help you with removing the rocks as well.
We'll go through this in the second part of this blog and throughout this journey.
But, let me not overwhelm you with all of this. We will share a simple step by step plan to make all of this easier for you. And if you’re wondering how easy, well if you’ve made it to here you’ve already completed the first step on your journey.
The only hard thing you have to do is to decide to take up our help. We’ll take care of the rest, just follow along. Let’s empty some backpacks.